(*Warning: Those of you with weak stomachs and disinterested in funny stories about bodily functions, should not read on…)
Everyone wants to make a good first impression on their first day at their new job. But no matter how hard you try something always gets in the way.
It began in the morning... I used the ladies room in our office, which is connected to a long open empty and echoing hallway. There were only two other people in the office, so it wasn't just quiet, it was silent. So needless to say, despite my best efforts, my discomfort echoed through the hallway. After I had finished, I was of course embarrassed but a little relieved, and I thought to my self, "Ah, the storm has been weathered"... (I’m shaking my head, thinking how naive I was)...
So lunch time comes, and my only friend at work, a guy who brings me my tea at 10:00 and runs errands for my coworkers all day, says he'll take me for lunch. We arrive at this small restaurant, which was obviously a popular spot for the locals of the neighbourhood, but I’m not so sure I’m going to like it. I look at the menu and I don’t know what anything is so I just order the special, (which often can go either way).
My friend asks me if we have hotels like this in Canada. And at first I think to myself, “Oh god, I hope this place doesn’t have rooms to stay in.” But then I realize that hotel and restaurant are one in the same here, (people will say things like, I’m going to the hotel down the street for breakfast, or I’m having lunch at the Chicken Inn). So I look around at the one room restaurant packed with people sharing tables, and I answer, “No we don’t have hotels like this in Canada”.
My food arrives quickly after I ordered it, and as soon as I took my first bite I knew things wouldn't be pretty in a few hours...
So as predicted, I was sitting at my desk, and my Monday lunch special decided it was time to go… So I rushed to the washroom, and I flushed the toilet first to make sure it was working, because often toilets don’t work. Of course it didn't flush, so I go to the office across the hall, and try all four of their toilets and nothing! At this point I wasn’t sure what to do, BUT I knew if it didn't flush, I would be leaving the worst first impression ever to hit my office. Finally, I throw embarrassment to the wind, and I ask my co-worker, why the toilets aren't flushing, and she explains that after lunch there is no water, so they never flush in the afternoon... (after she said that I took a mental note to never eat lunch again!). But she assured me that if I took water from the bucket beside the toilet, and lifted the lid to the tank, and filled it with water, it would flush... So I get into the washroom, and I start filling, all the while I'm crossing my legs, bouncing
up and down, and for some reason chanting "inshallah" over and over... But 6 scoops of water later, no flushing took place!!! So I took a deep breath, gathered my composure, and went to my desk
and tried my best to think about something else. I managed to hold off and my dignity was saved...... at least for the day....
Hopefully we check-in to another hotel tomorrow or people make more noise in the hallway. But somehow I have a feeling neither will take place…
